Who's Your Papa?
An Individualised Guide for Your Dad this Father’s Day
You got a haircut? Which one? This graveyard looks overcrowded, people must be dying to get in there. Dad I’m hungry. Hello Hungry, I’m dad.
… If your dad doesn’t spew terribly corny jokes, is he even your dad?
This Sunday 3rd September the nation will be celebrating, dad, grandads and other important men in their life. This means the weekend will be full of trips to Bunnings, fishing trips, sausages on the BBQ, for the fancier dads, a café breakfast. For my dad, he gets a phone call. Lucky man!
In celebration of our dads and all that they entail I’ve collated a special group of stereotypical dads and how to care for them this Father’s Day.
The IT / Gamer Dad
Ok if you have an IT dad you’ll clearly be indoors this Sunday. Spending at least five hours playing some incomprehensible, role-playing, fantasy, epic game. For me this is torture, for others… this is awesome!
Father’s Day purchases includes… well… anything computer related! So easy! I’m almost jealous your dad’s hobby is so clearly defined! May be best to buy a voucher. These guys can be fussy.
IT dad joke: How do two programmers make money? One writes viruses, the other anti-viruses.
The Hipster Dad
Omg I hope you’ve booked a table at the coolest café in town by now! You guys can ride your cool bikes to the café together.
Father’s Day purchases could include a whiskey scented Mandle (candle for men!), book a spot at a cool barber for a freshen up… or alternatively, scissors for your dad to chop off his man bun!
Hipster dad jokes: Q: Why do hipsters love ice? A: Because ice was water before it was cool. Q: How much does a hipster weigh? A: An instagram.
The Outdoors Dad
Fishing, picnic, boating, surfing, cycling or camping. So many option for activities this weekend. What fun! Unless you’re the child who cannot tolerate being dragged along on another one of those boooooring father/daughter fishing trips. Where he’s constantly rebaiting your line, and telling you to practice your cast. Kill me now! One day a year is one day too many!
Father’s Day gifts for Outdoors Dads are easy. A voucher from an outdoors shop. Bait. A new hat. An amazing reclining camping chair. A waterproof phone bag.
Outdoors dad joke: Q: What’s the difference between a hunter and a fisherman? A: A hunter lies in wait. A fisherman waits and lies.
The Musician Dad
A visit to a local pub for some live music. A jam session with the family and a bunch of guitars in the lounge room. Be a good son/daughter and do a duet with dad. Super sweet.
This is my dad. And if your Musician Dad is anything like my dad, you simply cannot buy them some music. They are incredibly fussy, although will deny this vehemently. So my recommendation is to avoid guessing their taste at all costs! Instead, try a new plectrum, a guitar strap or stand. Sheet music. Or… and this is the best… festival tickets!
Musician dad joke: Q: What did Al Gore play on his guitar? A: An algorithm!
The Motor Enthusiast Dad
Take them for a drive! Ask dad for a day trip in his favourite car to show off his shiny vintage machine. Listen to some cool tunes along the way. Or the lazier option, visit your dad in his garage, help out with his latest project and listen to his persistent pearls of motor wisdom.
Father’s Day Gifts can include a voucher for an auto retail store or car cleaning accessories. Maybe some merchandise from his favourite car, bike or boat manufacturer.
Motor Enthusiast dad jokes: Q: Where do Volkswagens go when they get old? A: The Old Volks home! Q: What’s the good thing about Fords? A: They come out of the factory with the problem circled.
No matter who your Dad is… don’t forget to tell him you love him this Sunday!
By Cat Cookson
As Published at https://lililife.com.au/entertain/whos-your-papa/